Sex toys can be expensive and finicky. Sometimes, you want a quick nut, but your trusty vibrator or dildo isn’t close by. Or perhaps you never purchased one to start with. Converting something in the house into a homemade dildo will help you keep the fun going even when you feel your fingers won’t make it.
While some homemade dildo ideas are dangerous and unreasonable, a wide range of things in the house can get you to an amazing vaginal or anal climax.
Are Homemade Dildos Safe?
Homemade dildos should be safe – as long as you remain reasonable. You should always exercise caution and common sense when choosing and experimenting with your new homemade toy.
Choosing the correct ‘thing’ to make your dildo shaft is the first step to staying safe. Since we can’t give a list of all that is safe, we will give you a set of directives you should apply to your selections to ensure you make safe homemade toys.
Warning: Always go through this list, even when reusing a homemade dildo you’ve successfully made before. Remember, all cucumbers are not the same.
Choose Something That Won’t Break
Ensure that whatever you choose to base your dildo on cannot break. You don’t want anything breaking and remaining inside your vagina or anus.
Try bending or twisting to sheer your choice before making your dildo. Careful investigation coupled with controlled effort and motion when playing with your makeshift dildo will keep you safe at all times.
Ensure it is Smooth, Very Smooth
Vaginal or anal walls are very sensitive and easy to tear. People even get hard by penetrative sex with a penis before sufficient lubrication.
Imagine what a sharp spine or shard on your makeshift dildo will do to you. Take the time to inspect the surface of your dildo to be before proceeding.
Take note of sharp bumps, cuts, or parts that feel rough to the hand. This could ravage your fun holes the wrong way, even if you use high-quality lube or homemade fake cum.
Get Something You Can Firmly Grip and Control Well
While losing a piece in you because it broke is possible, my biggest fear is having it disappear because you couldn’t grip it well.
Imagine a wet and slippery makeshift dildo that you can’t keep in your hand. If it slips in the downstroke and disappears in your pussy, you will have difficulty getting it back.
To avoid such an encounter, avoid small pieces that just fit. I feel safe with a longer piece that I am sure will take a lot of convincing to disappear up my vagina. Something that widens towards the end will be easier to control and keep in your hands.
Always Cover Your Makeshift Dildo With a Condom
A practical and additional layer of security between your skin and your makeshift dildo of choice is a condom or two.
The latex on the condom provides a smooth surface that guarantees of satisfaction and safety throughout your playtime.
Apart from smoothing out any tiny bumps on your homemade dildo, it will also give you a tested and proven hypoallergenic barrier between you and the surface of your homemade dildo.
You can’t predict how your pussy will react to that carrot, but you can at least predict how it will react to a specific brand of condom.
Keeping a couple of condoms around you is a good way to stay protected, whether you are riding a real dick, a professionally designed and manufactured dildo or a homemade toy.
Use a Lot of Lube
Lubing up keeps everything sliding smoothly. It will make your play session more enjoyable and iron out most of the imperfections a homemade dildo brings to the table. Going wet and sloppy will also prevent friction that could lead to burst condoms or torn anal and vaginal walls.
Always Stay Sensible
Finally, remaining level-headed, regardless of how horny you are, is the best way to stay safe when using a homemade dildo. Keeping the shortcomings of your makeshift in mind and working around them will ensure you don’t push it beyond its limits.
Top Homemade Dildo Ideas
With the safety precautions out of the way, here are top ideas on what you could repurpose to a dildo on your homestead.
Warning: Remember to run all of them through the above selection process. Everything we mention is highly dynamic, and you have to personally inspect and confirm that it is good enough to join you during playtime.
A Cucumber, Carrot, or Zucchini
Cucumbers and Zucchinis are, in my opinion, the most phallic vegetables out there. This has made them a mainstay of the dildo and dick symbolism worldwide. They don’t get this reputation for anything.
Choosing the correct size cucumber and wrapping it up with a condom or two is all you need to make a stiff and sizeable homemade dildo.
It is filling and has a patina that quickly pushes you to the edge of bliss. There is a reason why people even prefer them over the eggplant dick emoji you’re always receiving from your naughty friend.
- Find a good size cucumber or zucchini that can fit in your vagina and leaves you some space to grab and control
- Inspect it to ensure it has no tears or weak spots
- Clean it thoroughly with fresh running water
- Drape a condom over it
- Get some water-based lube and carry on with the fun
Since these two vegetables are stiff, you should mind your stroke angles and intensity to avoid harming yourself.
A Sizeable Banana
Bananas are another good basis for a homemade dildo – especially if you love the curve. You will need a barely ripe banana as these are stiffer and harder to bend or break off.
- Inspect the banana to ensure the peel is still intact and the furthest end (not the end it was attached to the bunch) is smooth.
- Clean the banana
- The end where it was attached to the bunch is where you grasp. The other smoother end goes in
- Wrap the banana in two condoms for better protection against the top edge.
The Base of an Electric Toothbrush
If you are looking for something smaller but with a bit more oomph than your fingers, an electric toothbrush could be the makeshift dildo for you.
The base of an electric brush vibrates when the brush is on. These vibrations are the perfect makeshift vibrator for you.
Wrap the toothbrush in a condom and press the base against your clit for the perfect thrill. You can occasionally dip it in to scoop some of the juices, but this is best enjoyed on the clit.
Corn on the Cob
If you fancy something big, you can latch on some corn on the cob. It has the girth, length, and texture for the ultimate sensation.
Under no circumstances should you use corn on the cob without a condom as it is too jagged and can possibly leave some residue in you that could cause infections.
When going the corn on cob way, I prefer dressing it up in two condoms for peace of mind.
With the right amount of lube and the right size piece of corn, you can enjoy the ribbed sensation as the actual bumps the corn creates slide in and out your pussy or ass. Take it nice and steady for maximum enjoyment.
A Shampoo Bottle (Or Any Other Similar Shaped Bottle)
If you live in a town or don’t have access to any of the plant-based alternatives we have given so far, you can get a quick fix by repurposing a thin shampoo bottle or any similar-shaped bottle in your house.
It has to be straight, thin, and long. Suppose the bottle is empty. The better since you can clean it to perfection before using it. Empty bottles are even easier to wield. You can even put some warm water in it if you prefer your toys to mimic the nice warmth of a real dick.
Check this too: How to Make a Home Made Butt Plug
Putting a condom over the bottle is still a good idea since it protects you from any sticker residue or shampoo residue that could harm or irritate you.
Pillow Stuffing in a Sock and Multiple Condoms
You could go down this path if you want something with a little flex. The amount of stuffing you put in the sock and how hard you pack it determines how stiff and rigid your homemade dildo will be.
- Get some pillow stuffing (polyfil) and stuff it down a clean pair of socks paying attention to how wide you make it.
- Wrap the entire contraption in two condoms to give you a nonporous surface between the fake dildo and your pussy
Making such a homemade dildo takes much experimenting to get the correct amount of flexibility, pliability, and girth. However, getting it right will give you an amazing toy you can reuse several times.
Warning: Don’t skip a sock or a similar tube-shaped sturdy piece of clothing to keep all the stuffing in place in case the condoms burst.
Bottom Line
While makeshift homemade dildos are safe when you understand their strengths and weaknesses, they are still riskier than their commercially produced silicone counterparts. The best way to keep playing safely is to save up and purchase a trusty dildo that will stick by you through thick and thin.
